walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
Randomize
