It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
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