Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
