just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
Randomize
