sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
This house was built for laser tag.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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