I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
i woke up today to a handjob from this really fat girl that keeps calling me michael phelps
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
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