not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
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