We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Randomize