we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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