Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Randomize
