Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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