So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
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