May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
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