I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
