oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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