So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
