It's just like the Real World with babies
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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