who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Randomize
