At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
