I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
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