Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
No subtext here. People are naked.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
Randomize
