yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Randomize
