The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Randomize
