she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
