I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Randomize
