he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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