i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
