I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
tell me about the fingering
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