it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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