People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
