its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
Just woke up to Siri reminding me that i need to kill the giant orange spider in my room, because it's sorcery and witchcraft is sacrilegious. Did you give me LSD again!?!??!
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
