like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
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