I got a call from 999 999 9999. I didn't answer it because I was too busy freaking out about the number.
It was probably Jesus.
I feel like he would have left a message.
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
it glows. i had to have it.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize