Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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