you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
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