I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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