I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
