in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
Randomize
