Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
The uberlube is also flammable
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
Randomize
