Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
