brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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