how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Randomize
