I can't watch pbs sober anymore
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
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