he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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