If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Your shirt... Was in my pants
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
Randomize