It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Randomize
