we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
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