So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
Randomize
