the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
Actions speak louder than pants.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
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