This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Randomize
